So long since a post. Its really an odd thing, when I think about it. Looking back at this blog its like the words connected to my heart came so clearly before. And in more recent times when I sit at the computer to try and connect my thoughts as a mother, a woman, a writer- I feel only fog. Blurred by the events of my life, perhaps. Some I'm afraid to even speak of; others, the experience so deep beyond words.
The last four years have gone so quickly. While I do not wish to go back at all (I have grown so much in this role as a single mother- learned more about life in four years then I thought possible in a lifetime!) I do cling to the image of a tiny child, with his smidgen fingers wrapped around my own index finger. Just four years ago!
If I could re-tell the tales as I experienced them, you, dear reader, would not believe the things I had to tell. Unbelievable stories of this strange experience of mothering a child through co-parenting when really you are the only real parent. I admire my life daily. Each night tucking in a squiggly boy with his quick tongue and desiring snuggles. Each night waking to his little mouth, breathing heavy morning breath in my face after he "snuckered" into my bed. I often lay there and admire the shape of him, the tone of his skin, the smell of his hair after a long nights rest, his full lips and round mouth, so fresh and warm.
How is this my life? I never could have imagined the fullness that my heart would feel.
Happy Birthday, my dear Harrison.
